The Melanin Unicorn Podcast

Your Power Influences Every Room You Walk Into

• Kerry • Season 2 • Episode 8

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Ready to change how a room responds to you—without forcing it? Kerry breaks down a simple, human approach to influence that starts before you cross the threshold and lasts long after you say goodbye. From reading energy to shaping your entrance, you’ll learn how to project calm, earn trust, and make your words matter.

We start with prework: who’s there, what they value, and how the dynamics flow. Then we get tactical with presence—eye contact, posture, and a practiced entrance that balances confidence with humility. Kerry shares a quick breathing routine to unlock tension so your face and stance communicate ease. Next, we move into active listening that proves you care: ask better questions, reflect what you hear, and build psychological safety that melts resistance. When it’s your turn to speak, we keep it tight. One to three sentences, strategic pauses, and language tailored to the listener—data for analytical minds, story for expressive minds—to deliver impact without dominating the floor.

Finally, we talk about the exit: a thoughtful follow-up and genuine gratitude for everyone who made the space possible, from organizers to staff. Those small acts leave a strong echo and open future doors. Whether you’re headed to a board meeting or a dinner party, this playbook helps you align with the room, lift others up, and still stand out for the right reasons. If insight, presence, and kindness are your style, you’ll feel right at home here.

If these strategies resonate, tap follow, share this episode with a friend who needs a confidence boost, and leave a quick review to help more listeners find the show. Your support means the world and keeps the conversation growing.

Kerry:

Hello, hello, hello, my fellow tribe. Welcome back to the Melanin Unicorn Podcast, the podcast where we explore how to elevate black women, their presence, and make every interaction count. I'm your host Kerry, and today we're diving into a topic that can truly change the way we navigate the world. How to influence any room you walk into. Let's start the show. Let's begin by first understanding the room. Influence starts before you even walk through the door. You need to do your homework. Who will be there? Or as we like to say, who all over there? What are their goals, values, and concerns? Whether you're entering a corporate boardroom or a friend's dinner party, knowing the dynamics of the room helps you align your energy with the environment. And here's a tip: observation. When you step into the room, take a moment to assess the energy and body language of the people around you. Are they relaxed? Are they focused? Are they energetic? Matching their tone, at least initially, creates an immediate sense of connection. Now, for me, growing up in Brooklyn, that was very key. Right? We were taught that whatever space you enter into, make sure you know the ins and the outs. Meaning, make sure you know where that exit is, make sure your back is not against the door, um, know who is in the room. Because sometimes, you know, you may find yourself in a situation that you had no idea you were walking into. So understanding the room is key. Now, next, let's talk about the power of presence, right? So when you're fully present, people notice. Make eye contact, smile genuinely, and stand tall. Your body language should exude confidence and approachability. Remember, your presence speaks before you say a single word. Now, here's a fun exercise. Practice your entrance. Yes, your entrance. Walk into a room like you belong there, but with humility and grace. Think of it as a balance between confidence and curiosity. People are drawn to those who seem sure of themselves, but also open to others. If you have a full-length mirror in your home, you can practice how your entrance looks. Like what is your gait like, right? So your gait is your posture. What is your posture like? What is your facial expression like? Sometimes we walk into a room and we have some anxiety. So the anxiety will cause us to lock up, lock our body up, lock up our facial expression, right? So as you're practicing walking towards the mirror, see what you look like, right? Sometimes the bet one of the best things that I've learned is that you take a deep breath, hold for four, and slowly release. And then everything about your posture and your and your face, if it was locked up, it just begins to relax. So just a side note. Speaking of openness, this brings us to our next strategy: active listening. Influence isn't just about what you say, it's also about how well you listen. People feel value when they are truly heard. So ask thoughtful questions, listen without interrupting, and show that you are genuinely interested in what others have to say. So here's a key insight: repeat or reframe what the other person has shared. Right? For example, you might say, if I'm understanding you correctly, you were saying this not only clarifies the conversation, but also reinforces that you are indeed engaged. Now, let's shift gears to speaking with intention. When it's your turn to speak, when it's my turn to speak, we need to make our words count. We need to be clear, concise, and impactful. Avoid filler words and don't be afraid of a pause. Sometimes silence can amplify your message. So now we have active listening. Because many of us, if I'm being a hundred percent honest, do not know how to listen. When a person is speaking, and I'm pretty sure you have experienced this yourself, when you are speaking, all of a sudden the other person starts speaking too. So how is that working? How, if I'm speaking, how as you, the other person listening to what I'm saying? So now what I'm getting is what I'm saying isn't important to you. It's not important because you're not actively listening to what I am saying, and vice versa. If the other person is speaking, and then you just jump in and start talking, how is that validating to the other person? Again, you're not actively listening, you're just talking. And at that point, it's just you're just speaking just to be speaking. And so you need to ask yourself, why do I do that? Or sometimes if a person notices, they will say, Hey, you know, let me finish my sentence. You know, um, you don't need to start speaking when I'm speaking. You know, some people may find that to be very insulting, but actually I find that to be very, very wise because the truth of the matter is why are you speaking if the other person is speaking? And if I'm speaking, why is the other person speaking? Okay, so number two is speaking with intention. You don't have to say a whole paragraph to make impact. Sometimes one sentence, two sentence, three sentences the most are the most impactful, which I have found. So you don't have to ramble on because you feel like, oh, I gotta say something, I gotta say something. No, one to three sentences max is something that you can say, and it will be not only impactful, but it will be powerful. And again, sometimes your silence is golden. You can mirror the language and the tone of the person you're speaking with. If they're analytical, right, lean into the data and logic. If they're more expressive, don't shy away from emotion and storytelling. This creates a sense of alignment and trust. Now, you may not think you're analytical, but believe me, you are, because you have facts and you have data. Sometimes we think that, well, that's not enough to mirror the conversation. No, it is perfect because you can definitely mirror the conversation, okay? And also with emotion and storytelling. Some people I've met are the most amazing storytellers, they just draw you in and are just so captivating, right? And so you may not think that you are um a storyteller, but you are. You may not think that you really have emotion, but you do. We all do, okay. And finally, let's talk about leaving a lasting impression, okay? So before you exit the room, reinforce the connections that you've made. A simple follow-up can be like, I really enjoyed our conversation about example topic, or let's stay in touch can go a long way. Because we never know what type of connections that we are making when we enter into a room. Sometimes connections are made before you even open up your mouth. It is actually the power of your presence as you entered that room. And let me tell you something. People may act like they're not looking. Oh, trust and believe they are definitely looking because your presence alone is powerful. Your presence alone garners a who is that? I would like to, I would like to speak to this person. Okay. So remember, it's all about, it's all about practicing. Again, you know, if you have a full-length mirror, which is great, and if you don't, if you just have your vanity mirror, that's fine too. You just walk in as if you are literally saying, I am here. Take notice. As a matter of fact, you have all been put on notice. Okay, okay. And don't forget the power of gratitude. Thank the host, thank the organizer, or even the person who sparked a meaningful conversation. Because gratitude not only makes others feel appreciated, but it also ensures you'll be remembered for the right reasons. You know, we were taught that you are grateful and thankful for everyone, right? Whoever had anything to do with a function that you attended, because it's important, right? You don't only say, Oh, I only want to speak to like the CEO or the president or the VP. No, you show gratitude for everybody. I have been at functions where I have thanked the wait staff, I've thanked the people who, when you go into the restrooms and there's somebody there that's um handing you the the towel after you washed your hands. I've thanked them. Um, I've thank the the people, if I got a chance to meet them, who made the food. It is important to show gratitude because what happens is showing gratitude opens up the door even wider for you to receive blessings. We have to always, always show gratitude and not look down upon anybody because of maybe the the title or the position or the station that they are holding. Okay, so always, always, always be grateful and show gratitude, okay, to everyone. All right, so let's recap. So to influence any room you walk into, start by understanding the dynamics, make your presence felt through confident body language and genuine engagement. Listen actively, speak with intention, and always leave a positive impression. Remember, influence isn't about dominating a space, it's about creating a space where connection, respect, and value can thrive. Master this, and you'll find yourself effortlessly making an impact wherever you go. And that's a wrap for today's episode of Influencing Every Room. If you found these tips helpful, share this episode with someone who could use a little extra influence in their life. And don't forget to subscribe and leave a review because your support means everything to me. Well, until next time, I'm Kerry, your host, reminding you to step into every room with purpose and power. And remember to have an amazing, remarkable, and magical day. And until next time, speak with you soon. I love you. Bye.

Contributor

Kerry

Host